LOOK AT ME!!! I'M STOPPING!!!

"LOOK AT ME, I'M STOPPING!! LOOK AT ME, I'M STOPPING!! LOOK AT ME, I'M STOPPING"!!


Flashed the most stupid ignorant distracting DUMB device ever on the back of the SUV in front of me.


"LOOK AT ME, I'M STOPPING!! LOOK AT ME, I'M STOPPING!! LOOK AT ME, I'M STOPPING"!!


Most people know what brake lights are and that if the brake lights are on, the vehicle in front of them is slowing down or stopping. It's not only common sense, but if a person has had driver's education, it is a known fact.


"LOOK AT ME, I'M STOPPING!! LOOK AT ME, I'M STOPPING!! LOOK AT ME, I'M STOPPING"!!


Brake lights are located on the back of vehicles, including SUVs. There is one on the left side and one on the right side. If one is out, the other will still come on.


"LOOK AT ME, I'M STOPPING!! LOOK AT ME, I'M STOPPING!! LOOK AT ME, I'M STOPPING"!!


Brake lights do not blink or flash. It is not their job to do so.


"LOOK AT ME, I'M STOPPING!! LOOK AT ME, I'M STOPPING!! LOOK AT ME, I'M STOPPING"!!


Blinkers blink and flash. That is their job. And if you had driver's ed, you also know this to be true.


"LOOK AT ME, I'M STOPPING!! LOOK AT ME, I'M STOPPING!! LOOK AT ME, I'M STOPPING"!!


But because years ago some whiny person with no common sense and no driver's ed, that couldn't tell a brake light from a Christmas light, complained they did not see the brake lights on an SUV and rear-ended it, SUVs and other modern vehicles now come with a several hundred dollar


"LOOK AT ME, I'M STOPPING!! LOOK AT ME, I'M STOPPING!! LOOK AT ME, I'M STOPPING"!!


light that is the most stupid ignorant distracting DUMB device ever stuck on an SUV's butt.


"LOOK AT ME, I'M STOPPING!! LOOK AT ME, I'M STOPPING!! LOOK AT ME, I'M STOPPING"!!


Let's get real. The


"LOOK AT ME, I'M STOPPING!! LOOK AT ME, I'M STOPPING!! LOOK AT ME, I'M STOPPING"!!


light is not a brake light and it never will be, no matter how hard it want's to be, or the regulators that cater to whiny perople with no common sense and no driver's ed, want it to be.


"LOOK AT ME, I'M STOPPING!! LOOK AT ME, I'M STOPPING!! LOOK AT ME, I'M STOPPING"!!


Brake lights have the common sense to come on and stay on, so that you know what an SUV or other vehicle in front of you is doing - duh - slowing or stopping.


"LOOK AT ME, I'M STOPPING!! LOOK AT ME, I'M STOPPING!! LOOK AT ME, I'M STOPPING"!!


lights have no job other than to confuse the masses who have common sense and also took driver's education.


"LOOK AT ME, I'M STOPPING!! LOOK AT ME, I'M STOPPING!! LOOK AT ME, I'M STOPPING"!!


After all, how do we know a


"LOOK AT ME, I'M STOPPING!! LOOK AT ME, I'M STOPPING!! LOOK AT ME, I'M STOPPING"!!


light isn't signaling that the SUV intends to go straight ahead, just as a left blinker means it's going to turn left, and a right blinker means it's going to turn right?


"LOOK AT ME, I'M STOPPING!! LOOK AT ME, I'M STOPPING!! LOOK AT ME, I'M STOPPING"!!


How do we know it doesn't just want attention because it's not a Christmas light or a brake light? That's the way things are today. Everybody and everything wants attention, including the


"LOOK AT ME, I'M STOPPING!! LOOK AT ME, I'M STOPPING!! LOOK AT ME, I'M STOPPING"!!


light. It wants to express itself and maybe prank you into thinking it's a blinker too.


"LOOK AT ME, I'M STOPPING!! LOOK AT ME, I'M STOPPING!! LOOK AT ME, I'M STOPPING"!!


And now we are on the highway and the


"LOOK AT ME, I'M STOPPING!! LOOK AT ME, I'M STOPPING!! LOOK AT ME, I'M STOPPING"!!


light has finally stopped it's incessant


"LOOK AT ME, I'M STOPPING!! LOOK AT ME, I'M STOPPING!! LOOK AT ME, I'M STOPPING"!!


cry for attention.

One Empty Tomb

We stand on the edge of uncertainty this Good Friday as U.S. warships head to the Korean peninsula in response to N. Korea's saber rattling.


History repeats, and it is much like it was when President John Fitzgerald Kennedy faced the Cuban missile crisis and a cold war with Russia was threatened by an actual war that no one really wanted and no one could know the outcome of.


The weekend will bring what the weekend will bring, and this life is never certain simply because our flesh is mortal, man has not yet learned to get along with his fellow man and most likely never will, and tyrants never cease to attempt to rule the world and instill their tyranny upon it.

But the first day of the new week will also bring a historical hope for mankind in one empty tomb that speaks of a life beyond this one where there are no tyrants, or wars, or sickness, or death.


The occupant of that tomb faced these things in His own life and succumbed physically to them because He threatened their very existence and offered the hope of freedom from them.


Not only was He the occupant of that tomb, but also the Landlord of life's vineyard, which gave Him absolute authority over it and the workers that tended to it and still do.


The difference in the darkness that fell on that first Good Friday with an eclipse of the sun and an earthquake that shook those present to their very souls, and the light that shone on that first day of the week that followed is staggering.


It is a light and a hope that transcends saber rattling, and war, and sickness, and tyrants, and death itself.

A Beautiful Day for Some of Us

For whatever reason I decided to go to Target this morning instead of Walmart to get the few grocery items I didn't pick up yesterday and also look for a pair of cargo shorts to mow in while the humidity is at the close to intolerable level.


As I walked down the fairly quiet aisles I heard a distressed, "HELP! HELP!" come from behind me and down an intersecting aisle. I noticed a clerk start running in the direction of the cries and then she stopped.


"HELP! HELP!" came the distressing cry again and she quickly started running again passed me and turned down an aisle where I could see the heads of two young women looking down at the floor.


I assumed someone with them had fallen or collapsed and it was confirmed as I heard the clerk speak, "We have a customer down!" into her hand held radio.


I silently prayed that whoever it was would be okay and I imagined them all cheerily getting ready to go to Target together on what is a beautiful, sunny day with cloudless skies, after 3 weeks of rain and storms.


There is a certain comfort and familiarity in shopping with family and friends, cruising up and down the aisles of a store with them and taking in the sounds and smells and activity going on around us, whether we need anything or not, and I hope this wasn't to be the last time whoever was on the floor would do that.


When I checked out, I was finally able to see up the aisle where several people were gathered and the two young women were there. There was something dark on the floor and I couldn't tell if it was someone lying there, or if someone was sitting up inside the circle of people.


I didn't know the people involved, but needless to say it was all rather unsettling, and it brought to mind just how quickly we are all headed to that final step we make upon this planet and into the afterlife. Though we tend to live as if we will always go on living here, our mortality is all too evident with every breath we take and with every second, minute, hour, day, week, month, and year that passes by.


Leaving the store I noticed a fire truck with lights on was coming down the through lane, and as I continued walking to the far end of the lot where my car was parked beneath the shade of tree, I watched the truck continue down the front of the store and join an ambulance already parked at the far entrance and sitting silently with its lights flashing.


I drove out of the parking lot, hoping that the person that needed assistance would be able to go home with their family later and this beautiful sunny day would not be their last one together.


Contrast and a smile was to come later as I went through the drive-thru at McDonalds. I slowed for a family crossing to go inside, and heard a little boy's innocent excitement as he clung to his father's hand, jumping up and down just a little bit, and expressing his joy at getting inside to get his chocolate milk.


He hadn't a care in the world and no clue that elsewhere, another person was facing an entirely different experience.


I hope he remains as innocent, joyful, and appreciative of the simple things in life like chocolate milk that bring us happiness while we are here.

Saving Private Ryan / Schindler’s List

                             A Comparative Film Review by Steve Anthony

 My mother frequently took me to the movies when I was a boy.   The lights would dim and I would sit there in the dark, mesmerized by the larger than life images being projected onto the screen from high above our heads.  We saw many of the popular World War II films of the time, including 

I Bombed Pearl Harbor, In Harm's Way, and The Longest Day.  While we were there to be entertained, I am sure each of us watched these films from a different perspective.

To a nine year old, it really didn’t matter what movie was playing, as long as there was the wonderful aroma and flavor of fresh hot and buttered popcorn in a box within reach.  I would also consume as many sugar laden soft drinks and boxes of candy as I could talk my mother into buying.  Occasionally there would even be a corn dog to relish; deep fried to a golden brown, with a yellow ribbon of mustard running along its length.  I never thought about the reality and seriousness of war versus what was portrayed on the screen until I got much older. 

Back then, Producer/Director Steven Spielberg’s incredible visionary talent was yet to be realized and there was no hint about the World War II films he would bring to us decades later.  Nor did I fathom digital technology, which allows us to experience the realism and horror of battle in the safety of a movie theater, or even our own living rooms as we can with Saving Private Ryan. 

Mr. Spielberg's vision, combined with his Jewish ancestry, also inspired him to give us a glimpse of the horror of the holocaust as rendered in Schindler’s List.  Using both films he brings us two very different, but equally stark realities of World War II. 

Saving Private Ryan, although opening with the historical allied D-Day invasion at Omaha Beach is mostly fictional from that point on.  Still, its unrestrained bluntness presents us with the harshness of war and the impact it can have on the emotions of those involved.  The battle scenes are portrayed so well that we almost feel as if we might be in the midst of them ourselves.  At the very least, we gain empathy for the real soldiers who were actually there.  

This is largely due to the skills and performance of the actors involved under Mr. Spielberg’s direction. ¹ Thousands of real men died on the beaches of France on June 6, 1944, in a battle which was a major turning point for the allied forces.  The film’s camera angles, close ups, and realistic sounds of war and death portray an image not soon to be erased from our collective memories.²  It’s almost as if we are allowed a brief look through the window of time at just a very small portion of that bloody day.

Saving Private Ryan should strike a personal chord with anyone who served or had relatives in the war.  For me it provides a small indication of what my father may have experienced, particularly with the closing battle of the film.  I had always pictured him with his buddies, trying to hide in a fox hole they had painstakingly chipped into hard frozen and foreign soil thousands of miles from home.  I could see them cold and shivering, rifles ready, anticipating the next wave of enemy soldiers that would advance toward them.

It wasn't until I was eighteen that I asked him about it.  His hesitant and quiet reply was that he had been in Germany in the Armored Tank Division, and yes, when required, he had killed.  He was proud to serve, but not of the killing, even if it was the enemy.  I believe this is why he never spoke about it.  Like the story shown in the film, although based on some truth, the reality is slightly different than I imagined. 

In Schindler's List, although not really a war film³, Mr. Spielberg tells us his version of the holocaust.  Unlike Saving Private Ryan, there is more historical fact in this film than fiction.  We know that some 6,000,000 Jewish people were exterminated by the Nazis.  There was also a real Oskar (Oscar) Schindler; a drunkard, womanizer, and frequent partygoer, who with his vast fortune and social status protected as many of them as he could.  History tells us this was more at the urging of his wife however, at least at the beginning, than from his own initiative.  At first Schindler’s goal is simply to make money by taking advantage of Hitler’s closing of the Jewish ghetto on March 20, 1941.  Later he realizes that a human life - any human life - is worth much more than profit.

Shooting the majority of this film in black and white provides a bleak canvas on which is painted a brooding and depressing image of the German death camps of World War II.  This technique easily allows us to envision a time when it seemed Nazi Germany would conquer the world and exterminate all those it felt didn't deserve recognition as human beings.  In reality there were more than just Jews imprisoned, mistreated, and murdered.  Ultimately we learn that men like Schindler can have a change of heart, give up their own security and fortune, and risk their lives for the sake of others.  Amidst this main theme of the movie the perseverance and will to overcome adversity and maintain dignity shines through, even as some victims of the camps go to their deaths. 

Because I no longer have the perspective of that nine year old boy and my own father fought in the war, I have come to realize that movies like Saving Private Ryan and Schindler’s List are not meant to provide entertainment per se.  This is as it should be.  While these films are intended to draw an audience, they were also meant to help educate that audience, and to commemorate the memory of the real victims of the war.  Together they portray its horror, man’s inhumanity to his fellow man, and the high price it took to defeat the reign of tyranny that threatened the world under Nazi Germany. 

Ultimately, Saving Private Ryan teaches us that no one should ever take for granted the freedom that we have, while Schindler’s List wants us to make sure the travesty of the death camps is never repeated anywhere in the world, against any race of people.

1. “There is terror in our eyes in some of those scenes, and rightly so, because we were genuinely scared…and we knew it was fake.” —Tom Hanks, who plays Captain Miller in Saving Private Ryan.

2. “What I tried to do in this film was approximate the look and the sounds and even the smells of what combat is like.” — Steven Spielberg, discussing his film, Saving Private Ryan.
3. “...and Schindler’s List, which I don’t consider a war film.  It’s in a category all its own.” — Steven Spielberg, discussing his World War II period films.

 Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
           a film review by Steve Anthony

What's more fun than a barrel of monkeys? A mall full of giant spiders of course!

If you're looking for a fun Halloween movie this year, don't overlook 2002's "Eight Legged Freaks."  You might remember the trailers when this movie was first released. As trailers go, what you see is what you get - a small secluded town invaded by giant jumping spiders. The action starts in the first few minutes of the film and doesn't let up until the end.

Unless spiders truly give you the creepy crawlies, this film will amuse (think "Gremlins" with eight legs) more than scare you, although some scenes of very realistic and humongous spiders snatching people away to be entombed in silk and have the juices sucked out of them later do provide a horrific ‘what if?’ nightmarish vision.

The filmmakers had a great time parodying giant bug movies of the 50's here and the movie even makes fun of itself in a few scenes. Watch for the little subtle horror homage jokes: a citizen with a chainsaw and hockey mask, a Looney Tunes®-ish fight between a cat and a giant spider inside a wall that leaves their prints in sheetrock on the other side, and even a quick attempt at often used sexual innuendo humor via a male store mannequin falling face first into the lap of a female mannequin. This happens so quickly however, that the kids and probably even some adults won't pick up on it. Don't worry about having to explain anything other than sometimes mannequins fall over onto each other amid the ruckus of creature features. [And sometimes their blow-up-auto-pilot cousins smoke on airplanes.]

Crawl, no JUMP online or to your nearest DVD rental store if you still have one in your town, pull up a web and enjoy! This is quirky entertainment that'll help take the edge off those slasher films you're watching on Halloween - at least until the door bell rings and a kid in a giant spider costume is standing on the other side. 

Song of the Cherokee

©2013 Steve Anthony
All rights reserved

 

Song of the Cherokee

 by Steve Anthony

[V1]

As I stopped beside a stream in a forest that's nearby

I spied a woman standing with her hands raised toward the sky.
She was old and she was wrinkled, her hair was flowing gray,
In her hands she held a little drum bound in feathers that were frayed.
I slipped behind a tree into the shadows of the day,
so that I would not disturb her as she sang, and as she prayed.

 [Refrain]

"Oh Great Spirit, now please hear me for my time is growing near

and my heart is deeply broken for the earth that you hold dear.
Man has robbed it of its beauty he has pillaged near and far
stripped the forests and the mountains and his profit leaves it scarred.
We've forgotten all you taught us; how to live in harmony
and to treat each other with respect, in your image we should be.
Please look down on us Great Spirit, touch our hearts and make us kind
And let us restore the beauty of the earth you left behind.
Aiyyyahhhhh aiiyyyahhh aiiyahhh aiiyyhhheeeee
Aiyyahhh aiyyyahhh hear my song of the Cherokee."

 [V2]

When she finished she walked slowly down a path and disappeared

so I followed just so I could see if she came from somewhere near
I stumbled on a pile of rocks with a marker there that read

“PLEASE RESPECT THIS ANCIENT GRAVE.
PLEASE RESPECT THE DEAD.”

And just below the marker were the words that she had said
They were carved into the ancient stones placed there above her head.

[Repeat refrain]

[Repeat] 

Please look down on us Great Spirit touch our hearts and make us kind

And let us restore the beauty of the earth you left behind.
Aiyyyahhhhh aiiyyyahhh aiiyahhh aiiyyhhheeeee
Aiyyahhh aiyyyahhh hear my song of the Cherokee.

With a Bang!

©2002-2013 Steve Anthony

All rights reserved

With a Bang!

                                                                                by Steve Anthony

            Uri raised his hand in the middle of our discussion on adverbs.  “How do you cel-ee– brrrate dees ‘In-dee-pend-ants Day’?” he asked.  “In my life, I have nev-rrr  at-ten-ded such a ting like dees.  I would like to make shorrre I do eet rrright.”

             I smiled at his broken English.  It was beautiful.  Uri, like the rest of the immigrants in my class, had learned a lot about our language in the months since I had started teaching them to speak it.  Now we spent most of our days drilling in conjugation, spelling, and pronunciation of the large vocabulary they had already learned.  They had heard of the Fourth of July – Independence Day – in the United States, but none had experienced it since arriving here to become citizens.  In just a few days they would know firsthand what traditions comprise our yearly celebration of freedom.  I could tell from Uri’s question that they were more interested in hearing about it than in learning more adjectives and adverbs.  I closed my book and placed it on the dull gray surface of the metal table next to me.

              “Well, Uri,” I started, “the class is doing very well in its lessons, so I think I can take some time to tell you how we celebrate Independence Day.”

 

There was agreement in the classroom and everyone nodded their heads.  Many started clapping their hands and wide grins of glee broke out on their faces.

 “Yes, tee-cherrr, please tell us about it,” they cried in unison.

 So far they knew nothing of the large family gatherings and picnics, in the backyards and parks of America, on the fourth of July.  The extravagant displays of rockets, sparklers, and firecrackers were as far from their minds as the other traditions our families have passed down, to be kept by each of us in remembrance of the freedom we enjoy in the United States.

 I began to tell them what to expect on their first Independence Day in this country. I started with the fireworks stands that sprout here and there along the highways weeks before the big event, like huge white mushrooms waiting for their caps to spring open to reveal rows of brightly colored items designed to entice the child in each of us.  Each stand’s big red letters and colorful streamers shining in the sun or flapping in the breeze, offer us a bigger bang and a brighter flash with each item purchased if we’ll only stop to look.

 Next I told them of the parades with their bright uniforms, marching bands, and twirling batons rising high in the air and falling back again, only to be caught by their owners before hitting the ground.  I spoke about the sound of blaring trumpets, and drums beating in rhythm to the traditional music of  Stars and Stripes Forever, America the Beautiful, and The Star Spangled Banner, and how the music rouses the crowd to heartfelt patriotism.  As throngs of people line the streets and avenues of cities and towns to watch, listen, and cheer them on, they build to a crescendo of sights and sounds to remember. 

 My appetite kicked into high gear when I told them of the picnics, and families getting together on a sultry July afternoon in the park.  I could almost see the paper plates being passed around, filled with generous dollops of velvety smooth potato salad, chicken fried to a golden brown, and piles of sweet and creamy cole slaw enticing the masses. I mentioned the aroma of charcoal mixed with the smell of hot dogs and hamburgers sizzling over it, wafting through the air and making people hungry all over again no matter how much anyone had already eaten. 

I spoke of children laughing and giggling and running everywhere with seemingly limitless energy, while adults chatted with each other and gorged themselves on the traditional cuisine of the day.  Here and there the crack of bat echoed through the air from a nearby baseball game, while the sound of a horseshoe striking a metal post driven into the brown dirt chimes in the distance. Now and then, a prankster tosses a lit firecracker dangerously close to someone’s feet just to see them jump, holler, and run away as it explodes in a white puff of smoke, scattering remnants of paper and smoke in a shower of red confetti. 

Finally I told them of the elaborate fireworks programs when darkness falls, and the whistling sounds of huge loads of gun powder and phosphorous being launched into the dark sky, to erupt in loud booms and paint a brilliant display of luminescent brilliance across it. At the finale of the display there would be a series of rapid fire explosions of sound and light, culminating in the revelation of an American flag in all its red, white, and blue glory above the heads of the crowd.

When I was finished, you could see the awe on their faces slowly replaced by the pride of having chosen to become citizens of this great nation of ours. Although I knew my words couldn’t replace the actual experience of an Independence Day celebration, I tried to make them anticipate it when it came.

“What I have told you is only a small sample of what it is like to experience a real Fourth of July celebration,” I said.  It will be much better when you go for yourselves, and you will build your own traditions over the years, for you and your families.”

There was a pause as they contemplated what I had told them, and briefly discussed it among themselves. 

            Finally, Uri spoke. “It is okay, tee-cherrr.  It is good. You cel-ee-brate ‘In-dee-pend-ants-Day’ like such an im-porrr-tant event should be cel-ee-brated. W-w-wid a bang!”

Inexpungible
      by Steve Anthony

"I'm inexpungible," he told me.
I knew then that he'd survive,
for he knew the very special gift
of simply being alive.

He had wisdom well beyond his years -
not so rare for him,
for he'd often been in waters deep -
that's how he learned to swim.

He knew that others are important,
not what they have or haven't got,
and every life is precious,
and never can be bought.

He knew of things that lay before him,
and of things best left in past -
that each man must make his future -
sometimes thrust upon him fast.

Yet for all he knew I worried,
when he made his choice that day;
not that he would not succeed -
but of his pain along the way.

For I knew the path he'd chosen
would be rocky and uphill,
yet once the pinnacle was reached -
he'd remain; steadfast and wiser still.

Then with a smile to reassure me,
once again I heard him say,
"I'm inexpungible, my friend,
I'll be back, day after day."

No Darkness in the Shadows

If the recently released trailer for “Dark Shadows” is any indication of the overall film, Tim Burton has just driven a final nail into the lid of Dan Curtis’ coffin and made many die-hard fans of the original gothic soap opera want to be chained in theirs just to keep them away from the theatrical premiere.

Burton is either very clever and has used all of his tired and lame gags (normally needed in a film for comic relief after prolonged supsense) in the trailer in order to keep the film’s true gothic nature a surprise; or he’s sold his soul to the devil for the love of money, attempting to draw money from the "Dumb and Dumber" crowd into the Hollywood coffins - er - coffers.

The first 30 seconds of the trailer is actually quite good, with Johnny Depp, a.k.a, Barnabas Collins, reading from his journal about being cursed by the witch Angelique Bouchard.

CUT TO:
Ships on a foggy sea, or already in port at Collinsport, Maine. They have arrived from England with Joshua Collins, wife, and son Barnabas on board.

Alas, after the film's logo fades out we are introduced to a jazzed up, wanna be funny, twisted Burton abstract of what once was an entertaining and alluring story of a family followed by one seemingly supernatural tragedy after another.

Fans of the original "Dark Shadows" know that Barnabas Collins was a clever and tortured soul cursed by the witch Angelique to roam the night as a vampire for all eternity as revenge for his spurning of her love. It was not she who chained him in his coffin for nearly 200 years, but his father, Joshua Collins, because he couldn’t bring himself to kill his son with silver bullets. This running theme of Collinwood characters caring for each other, no matter what curse befell them, is part of what made the show so likeable.

Fans know that Barnabas Collins would never rip the back off a television set while screaming for a “tiny songstress” to come forth from her witchery, but would have asked someone how the image was made in the box. There were after all, paintings in the 1700s, and Barnabas was an educated man, so he wouldn’t be all that surprised to see a clearer image – possibly moving – in a box. Even if he did believe it to be an apparition of some kind, he would have suspected Angelique and confronted her, or even a ghost. He would never have gone into a slapstick routine that has been overplayed in too many films by traveler’s from the past struggling to get accustomed to a future time.

Fans also know that Angelique’s power came straight from the devil himself. She wasn’t a Disney witch, who needed to drop feathers into a bubbling cauldron to turn Barnabas into a creature of the night. She could do it with a mere incantation, an evil look, and just a hint of hell fire in her sparkling and beautiful eyes.

Parodies work for certain films, “The Brady Bunch” and “The Addams Family” for example, but those shows were already comedies on television. A parody of a show that was never played for comedy and whose fans are as loyal as "Star Trek” fans - following Dark Shadows Conventions and mingling with its former actors some forty years later - is somehow sacrilegious. The fun of the original soap wasn’t slapstick, low IQ gags, and one liners, but its over-the-top melodrama, forgotten lines, crew walking in front of a camera, and the actors who trooped onward when it happened on live TV. There were also cliffhangers at the end of each episode that made us want to tune in the next day to see what would happen next.

Burton's “Dark Shadows” appears at first glance to be just another Hollywood "re-imagining" with ridiculous looking cartoon characterizations and worn out gags that just aren't funny anymore. Depp looks like a "Twilight" vampire in goth wardrobe, which is a modern day Hollywood image. Let's not forget the over- played-to-ad-nauseam hissing of modern movie vampires rising on heels, arms outstretched from their coffins - as if magically by CGI. This doesn't seem like "Dark Shadows" and shouldn’t have been called that. It's more like "Hocus Pocus Meets Edward Scissorhands and the Three Stooges." It’s surprising Burton didn’t think to have Bette Midler play Angelique as Winifred Sanderson's twin sister. She would fit right in.

After years of anticipation, it appears “Dark Shadows” fans will not get to see their beloved characters roaming the dark shadows of Collinwood Manor on the big screen after all. It appears they won't be jumping in their seats when something unexpected lurks in the shadows, because there isn't anything in the shadows but frighteningly bad and overused one-liners.

I hope I’m wrong for the sake of "Dark Shadows" fans everywhere. I hope Burton is just playing a very clever hand and there are some real ghosts and things that go bump in the night in the darkness and shadows of this Collinwood.

The Truth About Breakfast Platters, Christy, and Kids on the Lawn

After ordering a breakfast platter at McDonalds I paid and at the next window they handed me a sack breakfast.

"I had a platter," I said nicely.

"Oh, you were the platter. Please pull up and we'll bring it right out to you."

I pulled up and waited. And waited. And waited. After 10 minutes and watching 4 other customers behind me leave with their breakfasts, I called McDonalds on my cell phone. (I must be getting old, because I am the easiest person to get along with and I never used to do things like this. I know what comes next. It's yelling at kids to get off your lawn even though you let them play there for years.)

"McDonalds, this is Christy," she drawled in a raspy, southern, I-smoke-10-packs-a-day voice.

"I'm ...still...waiting on my...breakfast platter," I said firmly, channeling William Shatner.

"I'm bringing it right out to you (rasp rasp)."

"You've served 4 other people that were behind me."

"We were waiting on your eggs (hack hack)."

At this point I figured NOBODY else that ordered after me had eggs with their breakfast, because if they had, they would have been on MY platter first. After all, people don't expect eggs for breakfast at McDonalds and I must have been the first to order them even though it was mid-morning.

Christy was trained in dealing with somewhat irate customers.

"Here you go, sweetheart. Have a nice day."

"Thank you," I said, pulling the tied plastic bag through the window and setting it on the seat beside me.

Arriving home I untied the top of the bag and opened the platter lid to find a robin's egg sized blob of yellow scramble next to some hot cakes, sausage, and a biscuit. One wonders if they didn't have the heat up high enough to cook the poor thing faster...

Warm Summer Days

I created the melody for this 3 years ago. Unlike most of the music I hear in my head which is pop and country and usually starts with lyrics, this one started with a melody and frankly it was to remain that because it's unique sound and upbeat style seemed impossible to match to lyrics.

Then, about 3 weeks ago as I was listening to the melody, the lyrics below started coming into my head. I've spent the last 3 weeks editing the melody to add a couple of bridges to handle the lyrics. The melody is in the video below.





Warm Summer Days
Music ©2008 Steve Anthony
Lyrics ©2011 Steve Anthony

[V1]
The sun comes up: the rain is gone.
Warm summer days; each other’s arms.
Our hearts beat out a symphony,
and our trembling souls,
get lost in you and me.
You whisper in my ear.
Your words are all I hear.

[Refrain]
Warm summer days that we spent by the shore;
warm summer days that made us want more;
warm sandy beaches beneath the sun’s gaze;
your love reminds me of warm summer days.

[V2]
Soft clouds roll by; high in the sky.
Warm summer days; just you and I.
A breeze blows gently through your hair,
and your sparkling eyes,
can lead me anywhere.
You take me by the hand.
We lay upon the sand.

[Refrain]

[Tag]
Warm summer days; each other’s arms.
Warm sandy beach; you and your charms.
Warm summer days beneath the sun's gaze,
your love reminds me of warm summer days.

Karma At The Movies

[It's true that what goes around comes around. A friend reviews my review of Ebert Presents at the Movies. The blog post title is mine but I promise I did not write what follows.]

Steve Anthony Presents Ebert Presents at the Movies
[Fridays; PBS. Check local listings.] A Review of a Television Review

It’s true; we can never go home again. But Steve Anthony manages to take us back in time to those days where there were only 3 channels to choose from and no one had heard of TIVO® or even a VCR! He presents a time when people actually went out to see movies regularly. Before pricing, television alternatives (Netflix® comes to mind) and busy lifestyles got in the way of a grand night out. At the movies.

I found his review of “Ebert Presents at the Movies” insightful, accurate, and complete. It certainly has this reviewer’s reviewer setting his DVR to make sure I don’t miss a minute! While there were some technical errors in grammatical structure with Steve’s review, and some word choice that seemed inappropriate for the intended audience (I don’t think the average person would use a word like “apropos” for example), his review took me across the years and back in time. Many people can remember and relate to “Sneak Previews”, and the path that Ebert and Siskel pioneered. I personally remembered how sad I was to learn of Gene Siskel’s passing.

Steve’s review is a discovery process. Complete in historical fact, engaging dialog, and intriguing comparisons. The new hosts seem very intelligent and informative, and I’m looking forward to continuing my movie discovery process with their reviews in the forefront of my mind. I enjoyed Steve’s review extremely, and would highly recommend any further reviews he chooses to publish as “required reading”. Steve did his homework well, and produced a review that was compelling, and will not soon be forgotten. Thank you, Steve. I cherish those memories. And look forward to evening adventures! At the movies.

Steve’s review earns 5 out of 5 Stars! ☼☼☼☼☼

Ebert Presents at the Movies [Fridays; PBS. Check local listings.]

A Television Review by Steve Anthony

It’s true we can never go home again: Home changes, the landscape around it is altered by the sands of time, and most importantly, the people that made it home - including ourselves - morph and mature, move away, or pass on. Every-now-and-then however, we can recapture the flavor of home and provide the mind with enough familiarity and memories to make it content. Such is the case with PBS’ “Ebert Presents at the Movies” that premiered January 21, 2011. It is only fitting that "At The Movies" returns home to PBS where it all started, and continues to provide us with not only an entertaining look at today’s movies, but opinions about them that are well rounded and informative.

For those familiar with the original, “Sneak Previews” that began in 1976 with Roger Ebert and Gene Siskel, and later became “Siskel and Ebert at the Movies,” it seems like old times as the new show opens with bright lights and music, combined with warmly reminiscent pictures of Roger and Gene in the balcony; cleverly snapped from an animated reel of film. When the end credits roll, a brief clip of them from 1975’s “Opening Soon at a Theater near You” which was locally aired in the Chicago area, leaves us wanting more and seems apropos as it wraps up a show presented by new and youthful hosts, Christy Lemire and Inatiy Vishnevetsky.

For variety, the show even ventures outside the balcony to hear from correspondents and a film technical expert. Even the master himself, Roger Ebert, makes a brief Hitchcockian appearance in his own show; content to leave the new hosts to their work as he introduces them and others involved with the new program.

Lemire and Vishnevetsky are apt hosts and fit nicely in the balcony setting as they, like their predecessors, narrate clips on the big screen before them, then discuss each film good-naturedly but not always agreeably. One might not take to such youthful hosts speaking to what is most likely a largely mature audience; however there is no mistaking their professionalism and ability to communicate the good and bad points about each film, and do so pleasantly.

Make no mistake; this is not some re-imagining, remake, sequel, or even a prequel that didn’t need to be made. “Ebert Presents at the Movies” is familiar yet fresh and it serves a purpose, particularly in today's economy where movie goers need the ability to spend their entertainment dollars wisely. There have been many movie review programs on television, including several incarnations with Ebert, but this program is a direct descendant of the real McCoy and rightly deserves to wear its name.

There are literally hundreds of channels and thousands of programs on television but few make us really not want to miss them each week. Television and movie fans ultimately make their own choices on what to watch on TV or what movies to see at the theater, but “Ebert Presents at the Movies” is well worth watching or at least a reminder on the cable box or DVR, and a weekly trip home to PBS before turning off the TV to go out to the movies.

Jonah Hex (2010) Movie Review

My review of "Jonah Hex."

Jonah Hex (2010)

There's an atmosphere and look to "Jonah Hex" that is far from the appearance of modern Hollywood fare. It took me a few minutes of its outdoor cinematography to realize that it looks almost like a 1960s Technicolor western with rich colors not often used today in films. Intentional or not, and I suspect it was, it's what makes this movie just different enough to be appealing. Add a scar-faced Clint Eastwood type anti-hero (Josh Brolin), with the ability to speak to the dead and the fighting skills and luck of Jim West from "The Wild Wild West," (the television series, not the abysmal big screen venture), and you have Jonah Hex.

Jonah was accused of betraying his regiment and killing the son of Quentin Turnbull, played with delightful villainy by John Malkovich. He is hung on a St. Peter's cross (X shaped) and forced to watch his family burn to death in their home by Turnbull. Turnbull then brands Jonah's face and leaves him hanging on the cross to suffer, until he is found and nursed back to health by Crow Indians. From his near death experience, he gains the ability to speak with the dead, and he uses it to hunt Turnbull for revenge. After believing Turnbull killed in a hotel fire, Jonah becomes a bounty hunter to work out his anger and hatred issues. He is eventually called upon by the President of the United States (Aidan Quinn), when danger and destruction from a super weapon threaten the country.

I find most films that don't look like every other film, or follow the same Hollywood formula, interesting. This one, based on a D.C. comic book, fills the bill perfectly. It is most likely the fact it was made from a comic book and not a video game that gives it a richer story, with better developed characters, than could possibly come from any video game gone rogue on the big screen.

I was pleasantly surprised to find the always underrated Aidan Quinn in the role of the President in "Jonah Hex." Though not on screen very long, Quinn, as usual, believes the role he is playing. Generally, if the actors believe in their characters, you can have a good movie even when other elements fail. Brolin and Malkovich also play their roles as if they really are in the old west, providing the necessary belief system to transport the audience there as well.

There is one exception to the actor's believability in "Jonah Hex," and that is Megan Fox's "Lilah," who seems terribly out of place here. There are a couple of reasons for this, one being that her makeup is so perfect, she seems airbrushed. I realize that as the town's working "lady of the evening" she should look more made up than the other women in town, but we are talking flawless skin, eyelashes, and lips here; not likely for the period she is playing. She literally looks like she stepped right out of the classroom in "Transformers," put on some period frilly things from wardrobe, and magically appeared in the old west. For a moment, I actually wondered if she refused to appear on camera in less than perfect makeup. If so, shame on her for being difficult and demanding on the set. It could cost her a role in a sequel someday.

The other reason Fox doesn't really work here, is her age. She seems to be the only actor in the movie who plays the role like she's still in high school in the year 2010, and with the all-too-familiar fighting skills of a Hollywood teenaged crime fighter. Although Lilah is intended to be the softness in an otherwise rough cut cast of characters, she should have been a little older and not quite as soft, to fit in better with the other characters. This would have made her fighting seem more realistic and not just an added "Hollywood" gimmick. I'm thinking of the Karen Allen type from the Indiana Jones films.

"Jonah Hex" isn't a perfect movie, but neither is it mundane or boring. There are plenty of action scenes and explosions for anyone, and just enough of the supernatural to offer something different in western film fare. Its biggest mistake may have been opening against "Toy Story 3" and in the second week of "The Karate Kid." I suspect as more people see the former films and look for something else to watch, "Jonah Hex" will pick up more box office receipts to be at least in the top five next weekend, possibly #3 as "A Team" gets old with the summer audience.

Buy at least a matinee ticket or you'll miss the wonderful visuals, even later on your home big screen.

Excerpt From "Star Drifter" Chapter 4

[Excerpt] Star Drifter, Chapter 4, "Pursuit" ©1991 Steve Anthony

An excerpt from "Star Drifter." This is in Chapter 4 where Jason Garrett's ship has come out of a sudden jump to light drive in an unexpected place. Since I work full time as a technical writer, and always have several creative writing projects in the works but limited time to actually pursue them, “Star Drifter” has been a years-long project of mine. This particular portion was written in the early 90s and I was a little put out at myself for not having finished it as I sat in a movie theater and watched the USS Enterprise NCC-1701-D crash in “Star Trek: Generations” nearly re-creating the crash of the spaceship Transient from my story visually before me. What could I do, challenge the makers of "Star Trek" for using a scene from a book written by an unknown author that wasn't finished and no one had ever read? Not likely. It's not like they could even know about it. They say if you have idea someone else has it as well. That was the case with the two books, "The Glass Inferno" and "The Tower" that became "The Towering Inferno" but at least the authors of those had finished their stories.

I’m not even sure if this is ready for anyone to see, and it probably needs work, but here it is. I guess the biggst question here is, "Does it make you want to read more?"

She smiled back at him and wished he would take her into his arms. Finally he did, and her heart started pounding as he reached out to pull her close, starting to kiss her. As her senses blurred into the moment, a loud, alternately rising and falling tone pierced the silence, and the ship lurched, nearly throwing them to the floor.

"What's that!?" She was startled at the noise.

"It's an alarm. We're entering the atmosphere of a planet." He tried to remain calm.

The ship lurched again. He carefully made his way forward and crouched below the main viewport that stretched along the front of the control room. Reaching out, he pressed a button and the alarm went silent. Then he unlatched a small panel and reached inside.

"Get to a control lounge. There are belts inside the armrest. Slide them out and strap yourself in."

He struggled unsuccessfully with a lever inside the panel, then turned around and sat down with his back to it. Reaching up behind his head with both hands, he grasped it again. Pain from his injuries registered in his face and he groaned as he stretched, pulled down with all his strength, and finally managed to pull the lever free. He stood up and stepped back, intently watching the viewport. The metal plates covering it silently divided in the middle and began to slide to each side, gradually revealing a planet bathed in beautiful brilliant blue. It nearly filled the entire viewport.

"Behold the handiwork of God," he said in the midst of his awe. "I've seen a lot of planets, and man has made his share of artificial moons and colonies, but there's only one that looks like this."

"Earth!" exclaimed Letha. "It's beautiful! I've heard stories, but I never imagined it was like this!"

"You mean you've never been to Earth?" His eyes never left the viewport.

"Never. I was born and raised on Stevenson's Colony. I've never even been in space before."

He finally turned and made his way to the other lounge, stretching the belts across his chest as tightly as possible and buckling them. Then he shook his head from side-to-side and chuckled.

"For a first timer, you certainly know how to put in an exciting day.” He looked at the viewport again. "Take a good look at it, because it may be the first and last time you see it."

The ship began to lurch and shake more violently, seemingly ready to burst apart at any moment, as it rapidly accelerated toward the blue mass in front of it.

"We're going down fast and hard. I may have restored enough power to keep us from burning up from friction, or totally disintegrating on impact, but it's not going to be pretty in any case."

"Jason, will you have any control over where we land?" There was urgency in her voice.

"Not enough to get you within a hundred kilometers of wherever it is you think you want to go. Auto guidance is out. The best I can hope to do is keep us upright and as steady as possible. The hydraulics will do most of that with a little prodding from me. If you want to go somewhere specific, I suggest you call another shuttle."

As his fingers nimbly pressed buttons with each new jolt of the ship, an orange glow began to surround the borders of the viewport and rapidly fill it, becoming so bright that they had to shield their eyes. One of the control panels he had repaired suddenly shorted out, startling them and sending a shower of sparks in their direction before erupting into flames. Above it a cloud of vapor hissed down and when it stopped, the flames were gone. Then, as rapidly as the glow had appeared outside the viewport, it died away, leaving them with the view of an ocean's surface sliding far beneath them at a dizzying speed. A land mass appeared before them on the horizon and grew larger with each passing second.

"Jason, have you heard of a place called ‘The Ring’?"

"I'm surprised you have."

"Can you get us there?"

"So this is where you wanted to come all along." He turned his head and looked at her intently. "Why Earth? Why the Ring?"

"I'll explain later. Just do what you can to get us there, okay?"

As he gazed into her striking blue eyes she had him with one word; one pitifully spoken plea, "Please."

"All right, but I can't promise anything. I hope you understand."

"Yes."

"I'm familiar enough with the land masses to recognize them, but we're already in our last orbit and frankly, I was going to use it to slow us down a little. If you really want to do this, it'll lower our chance of survival considerably."

"I know."

He hesitated, trying to be sure that she really did understand, "All right then. Let's do it."

Looking intently at the viewport, he poised his fingers just above a lever and at what seemed like the right moment, slid it down, and pushed a button. The view port shields slowly closed together again and they stared at them until they could no longer see the rapidly approaching ground beneath them.

He punched one final button and yelled, "Hold on!"

A loud humming emanated from the Transient’s power pods as it struck the ground with its belly and bounced back up into the air. From what seemed like another reality, he thought he heard a scream. Letha? The ship came down again and slid several hundred feet where it struck a large tree and glanced off it to the left, sending a shower of wood splinters, gravel, and debris into the air. Another tree sent it back to the right, where it smashed rocks apart and ripped through several large bushes, tearing them out of the ground by their roots. It continued sliding, dragging rocks, brush, dirt, and the bodies of a few unfortunate birds and small animals with it, finally coming to rest only a few feet from the edge of a cliff, as a huge pile of debris and dust hurtled past it, and crashed into the bottom of the canyon below with a thunderous roar.

Less than fifty kilometers away, the Guardians awoke from their synthetic sleep, and prepared to make their way to the site to investigate the intrusion.

On Eagle's Wings

A poem written a few months after 9/11 as a college English Comp assignment.

On Eagle’s Wings ©2002 Steve Anthony. All rights reserved.

In an instant,

the flames are lit,

on the forge of a thousand memories.

Fanned white hot,

with bellows of terror,

they forever sear the minds of the masses.

Delirious in their fever,

the monoliths reel,

and stagger to the earth from which they sprang.

Eternal and phoenix like,

liberty rises from the ashes,

to soar triumphantly on eagle’s wings.

A Nightmare on Elm Street (2010) A Review

My review of "A Nightmare on Elm Street” 2010. (Note: I've outlined the basic plot of the Nightmare on Elm Street movies below. This may provide some minor spoilers. As of this writing, “A Nightmare on Elm Street” is #1 at the weekend box office.)

A Nightmare on Elm Street (2010) Nightmares are common, especially among children and creative adults, but unless someone suffers from post-traumatic stress, or makes movies in Hollywood, recurrent nightmares are infrequent events for most of us. In the case of "A Nightmare on Elm Street" the latter is the reason for this reborn, rehashed, refranchised, and thoroughly reheated, Freddy Krueger vehicle.

I confess I went into this movie curious, wanting to be entertained, yet daring it to do so. First of all I didn't like Freddy's voice in the previews and thought he sounded like Batman. Secondly, I wondered why it needed to be “re-imagined.” After all, the original Wes Craven project (same title, 1984) was almost unique in its day with its interwoven dream-reality sequences that were very effective at making us wonder which we were watching. For a 'big-on-special-effects' 1980s film with many effects that had not been seen on screen before, it still holds up very well on DVD. As often happens with movie themes, 1984 also saw the release of another film that relied on dreams as effective visuals; "Dreamscape," starring Dennis Quaid. That movie is a much better film, but I digress, and that’s another review somewhere in the back of my mind.

"Re-imagined" films should probably stand alone and not be compared to their predecessors, but it's difficult not to compare when you have two films that might easily stand alone in different movie going generations, if neither were aware of the other film. Where Craven is a master of terror and suspense ("Last House on the Left"; "The Hills Have Eyes"), and wrote and directed the 1984 movie as well as being involved in the 3rd film, 'Dream Warriors,' and "Wes Craven’s New Nightmare,” this latest film is produced by Michael Bay. Bay’s productions (“Transformers I & II”; Armageddon”; “Texas Chainsaw Massacre” 2003) tend to up the ante on whatever is involved, whether action, gore, visual shock, or sudden heart stopping sound that can make you jump in your seat. But sometimes the ante can be too big and ruin an otherwise good game. The bigger ante here is a more intense and brutal film, rather than a goose bumps horror story.

The basic storyline of the ‘Nightmare’ films involves teenagers who die in real life when killed in their dreams by a horribly burned and disfigured terror named Freddy Krueger. Freddy’s favorite way to kill young people is tossing them against walls, pipes, and other hard objects, until he can get them stunned enough to slash them with his glove made of knives that Ginsu would be proud of. One by one they are killed in their sleep, as worried friends and parents begin to wonder what exactly is happening on Elm Street. Eventually the friends begin to realize they are all having the same dreams, and facing the same nightmarish killer.

Make no mistake, this is not a film for kids and is rated R for bloody gore and violence. Craven’s Freddy was a child murderer; a bad enough crime in any decade. Here, Freddy is a child predator; an unnecessary and disgustingly hard to watch downgrade of an already twisted mind in the scenes that allude to it. He doesn’t start murdering the kids until years later when they are grown because they came forward with the truth as small children. This led their parents to trap Krueger in a warehouse, take justice into their own hands, and set the place on fire with him still inside.

The Freddy that emerges from the flames here, as portrayed by Jackie Earl Haley (Rorschach in “Watchmen”), is cruelly creepy and threatening. Haley can be multifaceted and with burned and twisted flesh make-up covering all but his eyes, he manages to conjure up a terrifying image we would not want to meet in a nightmare of our own. Craven’s Freddy, played by Robert Englund is fun in a horror movie way; Haley’s more brutal, and the one-liners as he cuts into his victims barely compensate for the brutality. I saw this movie with my 20-something son, and he made an interesting comparison as we left the theater. Where Englund’s Freddy might be Jack Nicholson’s likeable ‘Joker’ in 1989’s “Batman,” Haley’s is Heath Ledger’s heartless and cruel villain in “The Dark Knight.” I'm talking strictly character comparisons here. In no way do I mean to imply that Englund is another Nicholson or that Haley has the depth that Ledger had as an actor.

The new film is almost effective at making us guess which sequences are dreams and which are reality for its characters. I say almost, because we've seen it before and at times it deliberately indicates a dream sequence with flickering lights or other surreal imagery. In other scenes, the clichéd action taking place on screen makes us realize the character is really dreaming and about to be confronted by their nightmare. In THX digital sound (is there any other kind?) the scraping and clanging of Freddy’s glove against pipes and chalkboards truly gets our attention, and is actually quite, pardon my audionerdness, cool. But then I get chills when they play the THX logo tones, so go figure.

I want to be clear; had 1984’s movie not been made and this movie was the first time the audience knew of Elm Street, I think there would have been more surprises. The current generation seeing this story for the first time will most likely enjoy it as much as the 1980s crowd did the original. Still, each generation will probably prefer its own film. There are definitely enough startles here for an older teen date movie and snuggling in a dark theater with that special someone. But there's enough disgust at the reason for the new Freddy being burned that you may feel it well after you've left the theater.

Buy a ticket if you like horror films in a darkened theater, or wait and Rent/stream it when available for a lights-out disgustingly creepy evening at home.

Better yet, rent the original but stop after the first one.

My rating choices:*Buy a ticket* *Rent or stream* *Wait for cable* *Wait for network* *Just want to watch a movie and don't care what it is*

I get inspired by many things; a word, a phrase, a situation, something I see. This poem about relationships that end was inspired by one word of hope.

Remember ©2002 Steve Anthony All rights reserved.

If you left because of love

to bring me to my senses,

you forgot to come again

when I awoke.

If you left because of thoughts

that you weren't good enough,

you forgot that love judges nothing

but the heart.

If you left because of anger

to hurt me only for a season,

you forgot that love is forever

and you are gone.

Remember.

Poseidon (2006) A Review

My review of the movie, "Poseidon" (2006) starring Josh Lucas, Kurt Russell, Richard Dreyfuss.

Poseidon (2006) ©2006 Steve Anthony. All rights reserved.

One would think that with Sheila Allen, widow of the late great action director Irwin Allen, at the helm as Executive Producer of this latest installment of Paul Gallico’s book “The Poseidon Adventure,” that the filmmaker’s would never violate Mr. Allen’s first rule of a good script and subsequently a good movie. That rule, which he stated one evening in a television interview prior to the premiere of the 1972 film, was something like, “You don’t kill people on page 10 of a script. You get to know them first and then kill them on page 30.”

In “Poseidon,” which runs 19 minutes shorter than 1972's adventure, there is no time to develop great characters before disaster occurs, and although the acting is very good, without memorable characters the film is not as good as it could have been. Perhaps the filmmakers assumed we already knew the characters, but that’s not true when you change the actors portraying them or their circumstances within the story as is the case here. Sure, we know them to a degree, but not well enough to go beyond the classic roles we are so familiar with.

Also missing on this boat ride is any real interaction between the main characters; and the great one liners of the original that relieved the tension of the situation. You won’t hear lines like Stella Stevens as Mrs. Rogo, mocking her policeman husband, played by Ernest Borgnine, with, “Maybe you can just yell, ‘THIS IS THE POLICE!’ and it’ll open right up!” or just generally griping, “I’m going next, so if old fat ass gets stuck in there, I won’t be stuck behind her,” as the journey to find safety takes them through a cramped air duct. In fact, one of the biggest problems with "Poseidon" is the lack of any real humor to break up the drama and terror the characters face from scene to scene, which deprives the audience of the chance to relax. But, you can't have humor during a disaster if no one knows anyone else, and unlike the survivors of the original, who banded together, these people really couldn't care less about each other.

Once this Poseidon is capsized by a rogue wave, now known to be a natural phenomenon, instead of a tsunami generated by an undersea quake as it's predecessor was, there’s hardly time to take a breath, and the adrenaline never stops for the remainder of the film. This actually adds to the claustrophobic effect of corridors and crawlspaces filled with fire, water, and dead bodies. In fact, it leaves us feeling as rushed as the actors to find a way out.

One has to wonder what lies on the cutting room floor of “Poseidon,” which, like most films, probably holds some great unseen work by the actors, and maybe the extra 19 minutes needed to make us sympathize more with their characters, as we enjoy the roller coaster ride up to the bottom of the ship. I suspect, however, that even with restored footage we wouldn’t have a character with as much depth as Belle Rosen as portrayed by Shelley Winters; Rogo fleshed out by Ernest Borgnine; or Reverend Scott, courtesy of Gene Hackman.

The movie does provide a visual extravaganza of the stark realism typical of movies of the last few years, and when people are cut, crushed, drowned, burned, or electrocuted, you can almost feel their blood dripping on you, their aching lungs gasping for air, and smell their flesh burning.

Poseidon is worth seeing if only for the adrenaline filled ride and realistic special effects it offers, but with Lucas, Russell, and Dreyfuss on board, it could have been a much better film if we had had more time to get to know the people we were taking the ride with.

A Cup of Hot Chocolate

Like a cup of hot chocolate.

A Cup of Hot Chocolate ©2002 Steve Anthony All rights reserved.

Imagine picking up a smooth round stone, hot from the sun, holding it between the palms of your hands to warm them, and then pressing it against your mouth as rich and sugary aromatic wisps of steam rise from it, overwhelming your senses. You purse your lips against it and carefully draw in a dark, velvety infusion of sweet foamy liquid, that glazes your lips, sweeps over your tongue, and slowly makes its way down the back of your throat, as it spreads its warmth throughout your body.